Monday, 29 October 2012

Another tragic bullying story that ended so sadly...

...is this story from Ireland about a 13 year young girl, Erin Gallagher, who took her own life on saturday evening after being bullied. So sad, so sad to hear;=(

Here´s the story from Belfast Telegraph:


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Donegal suicide girl (13) warned online bullies she would end her life

'No one deserved what Erin endured,' devastated sister says
 6 0 29
By Greg Harkin 
Monday, 29 October 2012
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A 13-year-old girl found dead at her home had told those who were bullying her online that she would kill herself.
Erin Gallagher, from Ballybofey, Co Donegal, was found by relatives on Saturday night. Only 24 hours earlier, she had warned her tormentors that she would take her life.
Gardai have begun an investigation into the tragic schoolgirl's death.
Relatives were too upset to talk last night, but Erin's elder sister, Shannon, left a heart-breaking message on a Facebook tribute page saying: "No one deserved what you went through."
Erin's death comes just six weeks after Ciara Pugsley (15) took her own life in Dromahair, Co Leitrim, after being bombarded with hate messages on the ask.fm social networking site.
Ciara's father, Jonathan, told the Irish Independent last night that he was "completely devastated" that another teenager had taken her own life.
Erin had also been using the ask.fm site.
In a post on Friday, the day before she died, she responded to a comment which appears to refer to her being the victim of a physical attack in which she'd had her hair pulled.
She wrote back to her anonymous tormentors: "Do u think ur funny bulling me over ask.fm yeah u prob think it was funny when a f**in put a rope round my neck cause of yous, yous are that sad!
"Leave it now u had ur f**in fun get over it! My hair wasnt all over the ground trust me plus stop going round saying a got a bald patch I had or have no bald patch!"
Erin, who lived with her mother, Laura, and elder sister, Shannon, on the Silverwood estate in Ballybofey, took her own life 24 hours later.
She was a second-year pupil at Finn Valley College in Stranorlar, a mile from her home.
Devastated principal Frank Dooley told the Irish Independent: "The pupils and the staff at the school are very upset at Erin's untimely death and we want to pass on our deepest sympathies to her family.
"We are putting procedures in place to deal with this tragedy.
"Erin was a lovely girl, a very good pupil, who was very mannerly and pleasant in the classroom.
"I would appeal to parents to caution their children about comments they may make on the internet."
In her Facebook tribute, Shannon Gallagher wrote: "I love you darling. It's so hard to say you're gone. Everyone's heartbroken. I couldn't have asked for a better sister. You were a stunning girl. No one deserved what you went through.
"I'm sorry that I couldn't prevent it. Love you with all my heart."
Niall Mulrine, an IT expert who lives in Ballybofey and who gives anti-cyber bullying classes to pupils, parents and teachers, said Erin's death had left the community stunned.
"There has understandably been a huge outpouring of grief online following Erin's death," he said.
"It's unfair that any mother should lose a child of 13 to suicide. The communities in Ballybofey and Stranorlar are devastated.
"I know this is a completely separate issue from what has happened to Erin, but the sad reality is that children aged six or seven are now on Facebook and their parents think it is okay. It isn't."
Ask.fm is a website where messages can be posted anonymously.
Sean Purcell, the CEO of the Donegal Vocational Education Committee, said: "Our thoughts and prayers are with Erin's family and the pupils and staff at Finn Valley College.
"This is obviously a hugely difficult time for everyone concerned. I have been made aware of the situation and I have been in touch with the principal and the necessary steps will be put in place to support all concerned."
A garda spokesman said: "Erin's body has been removed to Letterkenny Hospital for post-mortem examination as instructed by the coroner.
After Ciara Pugsley's death, ask.fm founder Mark Terebin told RTE: "We do understand the gravity of the situation and I sympathise with Ciara Pugsley's family.
"Of course there is a problem with cyber bullying in social media.
"But, as far as we can see, we only have this situation in Ireland and the UK most of all, trust me.
"There are no complaints regarding cyber bullying from parents, children or other sources in other countries.
"It seems like children are more cruel in these countries (Ireland and the UK)."



Read more: http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/local-national/republic-of-ireland/donegal-suicide-girl-13-warned-online-bullies-she-would-end-her-life-16230943.html#ixzz2AhTSqJYU

28 comments:

  1. So sad... brings tears to my eyes to read things like that.. especially reading about how sad the family is afterwards. Breaks my heart.

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  2. Oh God, almost makes you think internet shouldn't be allowed anymore!

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  3. Well, we cannot control what kids do all the time and if you forbid them to have an fb account the contraire will happen. Me personally I would avoid sites likes this, i would not have a tumblr account for example and I just don't accept contacts just like that just like we were told since little to never talk to strangers maybe today we must teach kids also not getting in some sites. I saw once in the news a young girl who had to post a picture of herself witha banner saying "I am too young for being on the social media and so my parents punished me by obligating to post this" or something like that, kinda extreme I think but kids must learn to take consciense.

    What makes me sick are the parents who creates fb accounts for their babies, c'mon, it's full of stalkers, PLEASE DON'T DO THAT, between FB and Google they know were you live, lots of psychos arround.

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  4. Children are cruel everywhere, and that's the result of these lovely ' jokes ', kids killing themselves, thinking that they have nothing to live for, get help, do something coz the world sucks but no one is alone..someone will help. it's unacceptable these suicides of such young people when there's a whole future ahead them. I wish there's no bullying anymore or that kids face it and take it as a lesson to be stronger in life! And they have to learn to be carefull with the internet, it proves that can be deadly in the wrong hands because it's so much easier to bully someone when you don't have be face to face!

    Ps: you look lovely in red ;)
    Take care sweetie!

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  5. This is disturbing. I feel that people who suffer this type of violence feels as if they had nothing and no one to rely on these moments.

    I'm not an adult, but the experience that I have had from childhood taught me great things, and now I help the people I know who suffer this kind of thing, which are depressed, which pass by problems.

    Well, when I was a kid, I always had my parents absent for work reasons, but I always understood why they were always out, and I had my sister. I will not say that my childhood was bad because it was not, though I enjoyed it very much. I had no friends, I only had 2 friends who were my neighbors and I grew up with them. In any bunch of children exist the "leader" and so it was with me. I was the smallest, so I was the "does everything" ie, everything they requested me to do I did. They were boring things, things that mocked me, but I still did it because I was afraid of losing the friendship of the older. He said: "If you do not what I say, I will forbid the others to speak with you." Over time, I got more and more friends and my fear grew, I was forced to do things against my will.

    But I found someone in that kind of encouraged me and helped me change. I was a timid child, submissive, quiet, shy, I not expressed my opinion. This person, today I consider like a brother. This person helped me change and showed me that things were no like this. That I should demonstrate against what not please me. Over time I began to have a voice and I shot back all that they did to me.
    I left the "leader". I became stronger, I became very different than I was before. I grew up and makes a while that I found the same child who was bullied me, she had also changed. She assumed it was how much stupid and bad, and after both sides have grown and changed, that same child who stepped on me apologized for what he had done.

    This is the proof that with simple measures and helps the other we are capable of reverse this situation. The people today who suffer from it need to seek help from someone she can trust, even though it has anyone, she can help herself.

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  6. This is so horrible! And so sad to hear.
    It takes time until people decide to commit suicide, I know this from my own friends and my own experiences, and you only do it when the pressure is unbearable. I cannot imagine what the victims of bullying must go through to take that last step. It takes strength to kill yourself, I know this, a strength that you only find in deepest despair.
    On some websites, I´ve been a witness of cyberbullying, too, and of course I tried to end it. Me and some others succeeded. I don´t want to think about what could have happened if we hadn´t.
    It´s so much harder to track cyberbullying and I wish there was anything I could do.
    But since I lack the strength to, would you mind if I do some advertisement for your blog on German websites? Maybe there are people outside who are stronger than I am, maybe there are people outside that can help.
    Love, Betty

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  7. Hey dear Anette,
    I am about today's article very touched. It is so bad that there are so many types of bullying. Also someone in my family was bullied at work.
    He held it out by a year - but he was very sick. He was depressed, wanted to eat nothing more. For nothing he had be more interested. In the morning it was very difficult for him to stand up. His room was always darkened (The blinds down and the curtains preferred). He was hardly ever out of the room, except when he had to go to work. For a long time he did not talk about the fact that his boss and some of his associates bullied him. But one day I asked him what's going on and he told it to me. We have a long talk and he then, thankfully, decided to terminate his work. First it went to him is still not good, but now he has made a further training as a graphic designer and now he is hoping for a job that he likes and he will not be bullied. He has a very good chance to work again soon. Meanwhile, he began with his brother to make music. This has helped him a lot. Thus he has found recognition. He has now appearances with the band of his brother and they recorded a CD.
    I'm really glad that he is doing well and I hope it will stay so.
    I wish everyone who is being bullied, that he gets help in time and above all accept those help.
    I wish you now a nice evening and sleep well.
    hugs Gitte

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  8. Sad:-( it's horrible and I am very sorry. I hope that she is the last one who doen something like that.

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  9. It 's a very sad story ... Unfortunately, I know what it means to be victims of bullying. From when I was 11 to 13, my classmates liked to take locked the bathroom door where I was, forcing me to stay there until they decided to leave. I received injuries. They always asked me the money to buy a snack, and if I had not, I was beaten out of school ... Once I was invited to a party, and a guy asked me to dance with him. I accepted, incredulous. Later, a group of girls poured three cocktails on my dress in front of everyone. I ran home, embarrassed and cried all the rest of the evening.
    My parents asked me many times what was happening to me, but every time, I was lying. I do not know why, but I could not tell the truth. I had none, so I began to vent my anger on myself, punishing me for being so weak. So I started to cut myself. Before, they were only scratches, then became deep cuts. I'd had enough, so I tried to kill myself cutting my veins.
    Now I'm not being bullied because I changed schools, but am still not understanding what I'm doing here, and very often I still think of suicide ...

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    Replies
    1. You know, you are not weak. The bullies might be stronger than you, but that does not mean that you are weak.
      I´m pretty sure you know that all this shit - cutting, suicide attempts - are not signs of weakness but signs that you´ve been trying to be strong for too long.
      I´m sure you know this, but sometimes it helps to hear it from others.
      I wish you all the best!

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    2. Thanks , Betty Blue ^^
      I know , I ' ve been strong for too long , and now , I ' m tired of all this shit . But , you know , I ' m trying to ignore those thoughts ...

      Delete
  10. And of course, nothing is done until it occurs.Thank you for sharing that story with us. I've suffered bullying too and I know how it makes you feel. Plus, when my class mates realize how depressed I was, they thought that I was going to kill myself in the trip we made to Paris. You can imagine my reaction when I heard about that. Luckily, I changed of institute and I didn't see one of the bullies again.

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  11. It seems like these stories are very frequent lately. I went through a very rough patch when I was about 14-15. I was thinking suicidal thoughts and was just very very depressed. I don't know how I got myself out of it. But I do remember sitting and thinking "I do not want to be like this anymore!".. And I started trying and making a big effort to change how I viewed things.. and stop ISOLATING myself. I think that is a big problem! We get so down and then we push everyone away! In the case of bullying and things it seems like you have to isolate yourself to protect yourself! And that is the worst thing I think! We all need to be aware of people when they are doing this.. Maybe they are too afraid to reach out to someone, or have been turned down already for some reason.
    I really appreciate that you are bringing this to people's attention, I think it is so important.
    Lots of love
    Desi from Missouri

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  12. Hi Anette! It's really sad to hear stories like this. Teenagers taking their lives because of bullying. It's just not fair! It really breaks my heart to read these news, because it could bea friend of mine, my sister or even myself. I just was over! Anyway, thank you for paying attetion to this kind of things because it is really important for us, taking into acount that a lot of us are victims from bullynig daily.
    Now, I promised myself that if someday I had the chance to meet you, I would tell you this:
    Fisrt of all, thank you so much for existing. You've isnpired me in a lot of ways. One of the things that I love the most is singing, and I do it every single day of my life. The thing is, that your voice transmits me a number of emotions, and thanks to that, when I sing I do it from the bottom of my heart.
    Thank you for teaching me not to give up! For me, you are a great example of strenght and braveness and everytime I think that I should give up on something I think about how strong you are and that gives me the strength that I need to move on. Thank you for everything you've been doing for all of us. You have an important place in my heart, and you are one of my greatest inspirations ever! I admire you not only as an artist, but as a person too.
    Your are an angel!
    Lots of love from Argentina :)

    Natalia

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  13. This week-end, a eighteen-year-boy committed suicide in my town because of bullying too. All these stories speak to me because I could have been one of these victims.

    During two years, when I was 14 and 15, a girl in my class bullied me. I never knew why. Pratically every day she did that. I began self-harming because it was the only way I found to express my pain and to punish myself to be what I was. Or what she told me I was.

    Because of that girl I became depressive and suicidal. It took me between 10 or 12 years to feel good. But when things don't get well, I'm thinking again of self-harming, and sometimes suicide. And as I were not good, I met other bad people who backed up me in my believes : I was stupid, uninteresting, ugly, etc.

    Today, I'm 30, I'm quite good but I never wear short-sleeved clothes when I visit my family and in certain situations (for example for a job) because my arms are covered with scars, especially my left arm. I'm afraid to be depressed again. And, above all, I'm afraid that one day one of my children could meet one of these horrible person whose only aim seems to destroy someone else.

    And now, I love piercing as a way to replace self-harming, but also to "reclaim" my body. I don't know if it's a good or a bad thing, but I'm still alive.

    Sorry for the mistakes, I did not practice a lot my English since 2007. I don't have much problems to read and listen it, but to speak and write... well... It's harder !

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  14. I was very saddened to read this story, especially so soon after another teenager took her life. Here in Ireland, Ciara Pugsley's death was highly publicised in the papers, and I am annoyed that no one is monitering what is posted on sites like this. This 'ask.fm' site is huge in Ireland at the moment, many of my Facebook friends use it, and I see them receive a lot of hurtful comments on it. Sites like this, where you can 'ask people questions anonymously' are responsible for a huge amount of bullying, and I really think it's time they are taken down, or at least monitered for bullying.
    Thanks for sharing this Anette, the world needs more kind people an less bullies :(
    Love from Ireland,
    Charlie

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  15. This is sad to read she was only 13, a very young life . I had to close my facebook a time ago because the same "friend" who sent me emails with threats also sent me hurtful comments in facebook, and for that reason I can imagine the pain that Erin felt. unfortunately the bully don't have any empathy.

    Also I think that parents have to supervise what the kids write in social networks I guess that is the only way to stop bullying and now, mournfully the cyber bullying.

    Thanks for share this with us, it was sad but is the only way to make awareness.

    xoxo

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  16. I'm crying so hard right now. She didn't deserve what she went through. These stories are far too frequent. In my eyes, bullies who push someone to the point of suicide are murderers.

    Anette, I just want to say thank you for inspiring me to recover from my eating disorder. Yesterday, I ate a lot of junk food while queuing to see Lacuna Coil live and didn't think about the calories or anything in the slightest and you know what? I enjoyed every second. I'm so far from being better but it's a start. Thank you. I truly love you. Thank you for existing and being one of the kindest people to live. <3 xxx

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  17. The problem doesn't lie solely on bullies. Kids these days aren't taught to withstand negative comments. Parents need to teach their children to stand up for themselves and/or to ignore the bullying comments. There is no support system like there used to be anymore. Children need to have thicker skin as well as some adults. The truth is that not everyone is going to like you for whatever reason, but that's normal. You can't always please everyone.

    I see people talking on twitter all the time to stop bullying, but sometimes words aren't enough. If you see someone crying or getting tormented by someone, stop and help. I remember back in school I overheard a group of girls saying nasty things to someone else. I came over and told them to stop. They laughed at me, but I didn't care. At least the girl they were bullying got away from them.

    Take care.

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  18. I'm from Ireland, and this story has been the headline on countless newspapers, bulletins and news websites across the country. Not to mention that similar situations have been occurring over the past few months. I myself have recieved hateful messages on ask.fm regarding me and a friend. But thankfully, I managed to find out who sent the message and dealt with the issue. But I know now that these messages hurt, and they shouldn't have to dealt with by anyone.
    As a native of this young girls country, I appreciate that you've shared this article, Anette. Making people aware of these horrible situations can prove very important.

    With love,
    Cathal in Ireland.

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  19. Hi Anette! I am from Argentina, and this week a girl of 11 year old was the victim of "bullying" in the province of Corrientes. Her name is Abril, she was violently pushed by a classmate in gym class, falling paraplegic because of a blow to the spinal. Her´s family don't have money for treatment and get help. A very sad case!
    I want to share a Facebook page for people of Argentina do not know how to act in these cases!

    https://www.facebook.com/pages/Anti-Bullying-ARGENTINA/173755859386778

    Thanks for taking the "TabĂș" to something as important as bullying.
    I never suffered bullying or know anyone who has suffered, but I can not take it personally.
    Greeting from Argentina!

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  20. It is easier to bother someone else than reading a book, so why this people should care if they don't have any sort of aspirations? 90% of people lives under constant frustration but they all pretend not to, what do you expect from a culture based on lies and fear?, bad combination.

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  21. Take a look at this, I really don't know in wich cathegory fits. http://www.israelnationalnews.com/News/News.aspx/161504

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  22. This is horrible. The most sad thing about all those stories are that the victims of all these crimes are always unseen. There's no one who can really notice what's happening, and,in a particoular way, when it happens between young guys, those problems are undrestimated and called "simple arguments beetween children". Only after a tragedy like this everyone can really open their eyes. Why do we always need a tragedy to understand so simple things?! People have to take care of this and take precautions BEFORE that.
    The most disgusting thing about it is that sometimes I hear or read on the internet people's opinion like :"This is not a serious problem, if someone is making fun of you don't listen or pretend not to hear"...Yes, it's really easy to say...BUT NOT TO DO. People can take you to exasperation. And someone makes fun of that too...
    Thanks for sharing this with us...It's time for everyone to see how is the world we have created.

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  23. The headline is also worthy of note. Even AFTER HER SUICIDE, she's being bullied..."Donegal Suicide Girl" - sounds like something a bully would call her if she could still hear it, doesn't it? We often forget that the media is one of the biggest bullies out there, too.

    Just like I've been called "seizure girl" a few times because of my epilepsy. The media influences a lot of bullies, or even gives them a platform to shout from, like Nancy Grace here in America. Just something to think about.

    Hope you're doing great, Anette!

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  24. I mean does:-) I writed doenXD

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  25. I am teacher and see many bullyng situations in the school were I work. I wrote a music to my student that killed yourself two years ago because bullyng. Very sad.

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